Well Day 1 of Back On My Grind Like The Fall was a go! Ok long title I know but whatever. Anyhoo my Soror couldn't come because of work :-( and my other friend couldn't come because of childcare issue and my other friend...well she didn't text back lol but another Soror did come! Yeah for the quadruple accountability system! And she brought a friend! We had a blast. As I mentioned it was Zumba class so its kinda like salsa dancing with a little Reggae-ton flavor. I got there early and did about 20 minutes on the treadmill and then did the class for 60 minutes.
I was happy it was such a good workout! I must admit the last few times I took the class I was a little frustrated with the teacher because she kept stopping to give the dance lesson but maybe someone said something *oops I think I did... to my personal trainer/the gym owner! Right I forgot! lol* the fact is, it is a good class, but I am not on Dancing With The Stars! I am trying to get my cardio fix and stopping like that defeats the purpose! Well if he said something; Good! Because I got my sweat on! Something I did notice was my type A personality shining through as I tried to get the steps 'just so.' I was so intense the teacher looked and me and said "SMILE! THIS IS FUN!" "Hummm getting it right is fun" is what my Ego said. Me & my ego...speaking of which, I am reading the book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. I am in love with this book. Like deep unconditional love. There is a whole section about ego where she is in an Ashram in India meets this witty, crazy, Texan (that explains it all right there) ...Ladies & Gentleman Richard from Texas has arrived! Anyway she is having trouble getting her mind right to meditate. The problem is her mind is unruly and she ends up having these big blow out arguments with herself and doesn't know why:
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"All I seem to do is argue with myself when I try to meditate." Elizabeth
"That's just your ego, trying to make sure it stays in charge. This is what your ego does. It keeps you feeling separate, keeps you with a sense of duality, tries to convince you that you're flawed and broken and alone instead of whole." Richard
"But how does that serve me?" Elizabeth
"It doesn't serve you. Your ego's job isnt to serve you. Its only job is to keep itself in power. And right now your ego's scared to death cuz its about to get downsized. You keep on this spiritual path, baby, and that bad boy's days are numbered. Pretty soon your ego with be out of work, and your heart'll be making all the decisions. So your ego's fighting for its life...don't listen to it." Richard
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I felt like that last night. Here I am back to working out (more) and I am burning up inside because (listen in to my crazy mind) "My arms are too jiggley, my feet wont turn just so, my ponytail looks too thin, my breath taste like Whey protein, and oh crap did my feet shrink because these $100 sneakers feel like they are about to fly off and hit someone in the head and I don't want to buy a new pair right now damn... did I book my hotel room in Panama? I need new shoes for that trip..." and the list goes on and on and "Oh damn-it my salsa arms look sad! Hope I can step it up before Panama and Trinidad I don't want to look like I can't dance with the natives!" Yeah all like that...
I was happy it was such a good workout! I must admit the last few times I took the class I was a little frustrated with the teacher because she kept stopping to give the dance lesson but maybe someone said something *oops I think I did... to my personal trainer/the gym owner! Right I forgot! lol* the fact is, it is a good class, but I am not on Dancing With The Stars! I am trying to get my cardio fix and stopping like that defeats the purpose! Well if he said something; Good! Because I got my sweat on! Something I did notice was my type A personality shining through as I tried to get the steps 'just so.' I was so intense the teacher looked and me and said "SMILE! THIS IS FUN!" "Hummm getting it right is fun" is what my Ego said. Me & my ego...speaking of which, I am reading the book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. I am in love with this book. Like deep unconditional love. There is a whole section about ego where she is in an Ashram in India meets this witty, crazy, Texan (that explains it all right there) ...Ladies & Gentleman Richard from Texas has arrived! Anyway she is having trouble getting her mind right to meditate. The problem is her mind is unruly and she ends up having these big blow out arguments with herself and doesn't know why:
****************************************
"All I seem to do is argue with myself when I try to meditate." Elizabeth
"That's just your ego, trying to make sure it stays in charge. This is what your ego does. It keeps you feeling separate, keeps you with a sense of duality, tries to convince you that you're flawed and broken and alone instead of whole." Richard
"But how does that serve me?" Elizabeth
"It doesn't serve you. Your ego's job isnt to serve you. Its only job is to keep itself in power. And right now your ego's scared to death cuz its about to get downsized. You keep on this spiritual path, baby, and that bad boy's days are numbered. Pretty soon your ego with be out of work, and your heart'll be making all the decisions. So your ego's fighting for its life...don't listen to it." Richard
******************************************
I felt like that last night. Here I am back to working out (more) and I am burning up inside because (listen in to my crazy mind) "My arms are too jiggley, my feet wont turn just so, my ponytail looks too thin, my breath taste like Whey protein, and oh crap did my feet shrink because these $100 sneakers feel like they are about to fly off and hit someone in the head and I don't want to buy a new pair right now damn... did I book my hotel room in Panama? I need new shoes for that trip..." and the list goes on and on and "Oh damn-it my salsa arms look sad! Hope I can step it up before Panama and Trinidad I don't want to look like I can't dance with the natives!" Yeah all like that...
Meanwhile I should have been grateful that I can work out and that I went to work out and I had the opportunity to do some exercise and have fun. I tried to break free of the mind trap but I couldn't the negative stuff just kept coming up like mental word vomit.
Lesson learned... I will check myself next time...maybe tonight will be a good Take 2 opportunity. Day 2- Is going to be Socarobics and maybe the Chizel it class. In an effort to get back into working out I need to get to the gym at least 4 times a week. I want to make sure I don't over do it though. I have a tendency to go full speed ahead and I am in the process of the 21-Day Consciousness Cleanse and one of my goals was to be kind to my body and exercising in excess is not being kind. But we will see. The goal is to do (5) 60 minutes sessions of cardio & Strenght training a week... period. I get 2 in with my personal training and the other 3 will be classes or my treadmill at home. I have a meeting Saturday so I will not see my trainer so that means making that work out up somewhere else plus I missed Monday because of my Doctor's appointment. So two classes might be a good thing tonight.
We shall see I'll check back and let you know how it goes!
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